Holy Mother of Pearl!

Great green gobs of greasy grimy gopher guts! Hard to believe it’s been three, count ’em THREE years since I posted anything on this here blog!

Yes, I’m sure everyone assumed I moved on to bigger and better things, like, you know, having a life, and alas, it twas true.

Until now.

Now, I no longer have a life. Or perhaps, it twouldst be more accurate to say that I’ve started a new life. Sans wife, sans kids (geographically speaking), and with naught but a codependent cat with daddy issues to keep me company, I’ve decided to rejoin that august company of souls, that elite company of backyard bloggers and self-appointed, self-righteous “journalists” who will bravely and with utter abandon create blog posts for the teeming hordes of roughly three to five readers on a good day.

It is a challenge, for, as I ponder the question, I realize that the blogs I most enjoy, and frequent most often, have one most compelling trait in common. They post. Every. freakin’ day. And so I visit. Almost every. freakin’. day.

And with that, I feel as though I must bravely forgo one or more nightly Netflix episodes of Supernatural or Van Helsing in order to bring my clamoring fans that sweet nectar they crave. Let my vague and opinionated ramblings spew forth upon an unsuspecting Internet, and let the few tattered bits of brain I have left rattling around in this increasingly grey-cased skull of mine entertain you with a quaint turn of phrase, or, more likely, some caustic diatribe about some compelling social issue about which I have just enough information to be laughably wrong.

So, hail! What few denizens of the interwebs such as stumble across my musings. I welcome you. Come, let us reason together!

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